When we exchanged rings, we hoped our family of two would grow.
It has, into a family of 4. We're just split in half.
Two of us walk the Earth while two of us fly in Heaven.

Monday, October 31, 2011

My first video blog "vlog"

I've jumped on Angie's still life with circles : spoken word bandwagon. The post I chose to read is one from her blog series "right where I am in my grief". I chose my post on where I was in my grief with Evan. I should tell you that when I get nervous I start talking really fast. My voice breaks several times so bear with me here.

I should also add that while reading your blogs, I get an idea of what you sound like. Sometimes my head's version of what you sound like matches, other times I'm way off. Heather Kasowski, you sounded the same in my head as when I met you last year. :)

Here we go...

My original post (edited slightly as I read it outloud).


Kate said...

Oh Kara, my heart breaks for you. I'm so sorry about Even. I'm so sorry he's not here in your arms. And I'm so sorry about Julia. It's all so unfair.
I've come over from Angie's blog. I'm glad I've found you but not all at the same time.
Your anguish and courage and realness is palpable. What an amazing Mama you are.
We have similar birth stories of our boys. The NICU, removing life support. We had 5 days with our precious Joseph.
Oh, I just wish it was all so different for you. And I WISH WISH WISH that this month is your month. I pray that you have that living, breathing, crying baby in your arms. I'm just so sorry. Love and peace and light to you Kara. xoxo
PS - thankyou for sharing yourself in this way.

Crystal said...

Sending you many, many hugs and prayers. I'm so very sorry that Evan and Julia couldn't stay with you.

erica said...

Oh, beautiful, brave mama. I wish I could reach through the screen and give you a hug. Listening to you and seeing your face as you read these words brought tears to my eyes. I so wish that Julia and Evan were both with you, filling up your arms, filling your house with noise. Thank you for the honesty and bravery of this post.

Much love to you and your babies.

Catherine W said...

I remember reading both of your 'Right Where I Am' posts. I wouldn't have believed it possible but it is even more heartbreaking to hear them read out loud, to hear your children remembered by their mother. I'm so sorry that Evan and Julia are not with you, their loving parents. There is so much love for your family in your voice and in your eyes.

Hoping with you for the future and remembering your precious son and daughter. Thank you for posting xoxo

Stefanie said...

Thank you for sharing. I too, constantly feel like I need to make sure no one forgets my son. I feel like it is our duty to our children to make sure people realize and treasure their existence. Much love and hugs to you.

Holly said...

Your reading of this grips my heart. ♥

Mother Henna said...

Remembering and re-member-ing with you...I'm so very sorry... grief stinks... but I am remembering... Miracles to you... from another Kara in the world :) aka Mother Henna

Hope's Mama said...

This absolutely tore my heart out. I mourn Julia and Evan with you. I am so very sorry they are not here, in your arms.
You spoke with pure courage and love.

Fireflyforever said...

I remember reading your words when you shared them - hearing you read them was very moving - your love for your children beams from every word. I wish they were here and I wish you hope and joy in the future.

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